whats the latest in soul crushing office lingo

Let's talk Aguachile Alley

Postby The Priest » Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:50 am

broodstar wrote:tldr is always a bad sign, and yet, i have used it??? because i dont know how to write??


tldr for the written word makes sense because it's a visual cue that you can get a quick summary

saying "tldr" and then giving the summary after everyone had to sit through your long-winded b.s. is just a way of recapping, but WE ALREADY HAD TO HEAR THE WHOLE THING
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Postby The Priest » Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:52 am

I think if I heard someone say "here's the tldr;" and then give a quick explanation followed by a longer one I'd only be slightly bothered by it but of course people love to be long-winded blowhards so that will only happen in a moment of post-rambling shame
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Postby all day breakfast » Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:52 am

ero guro vidal (aka todd) wrote:how come we gotta say bio break instead of taking a shit?


the language of MMO raids and business meetings eventually converging in the middle makes a lot of sense
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Postby broodstar » Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:52 am

boss: are your cooldowns almost up
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Postby The Priest » Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:54 am

how about instead of saying "bio break" we just say "break" because we know that humans have to piss/shit/drink/eat/rest
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Postby all day breakfast » Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:55 am

do NOT come to the meeting without having watched the strategy videos
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Postby The Priest » Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:55 am

I was once at a client meeting and someone said "bio break" and I said "number 1 or number 2?" and it did not go over well
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Postby broodstar » Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:56 am

there are a lot of mmo guilds more demanding than a job anyway
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Postby broodstar » Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:57 am

u ever face the "u need to be available at least once every 8 hours or u get booted" crunch
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Postby Feech La Manna » Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:59 am

imo the workers should seize the method of loot distribution
badhat wrote:bike solve all problems
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Postby Shotfrog » Mon Sep 27, 2021 9:27 am

Why does every reminder have to be "friendly" or "gentle" when neither of those is called for?
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Postby The Priest » Mon Sep 27, 2021 9:45 am

I love a good gentle reminder
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Postby Woke Mind Virus » Mon Sep 27, 2021 10:08 am

every business process is now a "journey"
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Postby garbiel » Mon Sep 27, 2021 12:11 pm

almost said holding pattern in conversation yesterday
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Postby broodstar » Mon Sep 27, 2021 12:19 pm

i'm in a department-wide teams call and i'm reading somewhat passive aggressive "thank you, mr puma"s

corporate owns imho
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Postby auspice » Mon Nov 08, 2021 12:18 pm

I don't remember if there's a thread for email-isms but this is my first time seeing this.

from the end of an email I received this morning:

Could we pencil in a few minutes either Wednesday or Thursday this week to discuss further?


this is just a sales guy at a data company pitching their product so I'm tempted to respond, "Hmm, sorry but this boy only uses pens."

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Postby waldojeffers1 » Mon Nov 08, 2021 12:32 pm

I have a seven hour training this week on how to be a more engaged and dynamic manager
oh no someone save us
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Postby The Priest » Mon Nov 08, 2021 12:36 pm

You got this, waldo i believe in you
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Postby light rail coyote » Mon Nov 08, 2021 12:45 pm

what about being a more entergaging manager?
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Postby Shotfrog » Mon Nov 08, 2021 12:48 pm

I heard “double click on that,” meaning to focus on it more, today. Think it’s been mentioned in this thread but my first encounter in the wild.
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Postby easy » Mon Nov 08, 2021 1:27 pm

so fucking sick of "ping me"
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Postby Barthes Starr » Mon Nov 08, 2021 5:49 pm

Shotfrog wrote:I heard “double click on that,” meaning to focus on it more, today. Think it’s been mentioned in this thread but my first encounter in the wild.


yeah this was me lol
my friend said it irl in a non-work social setting. hated it
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Postby Beez » Mon Nov 08, 2021 8:40 pm

Has anyone said abundance of caution?
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Postby Oranges » Tue Nov 09, 2021 1:51 pm

i think succession is rotting my brain because ive been talking about taking temperature on things a lot 😞
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Postby waldojeffers1 » Thu Nov 11, 2021 12:58 pm

waldojeffers1 wrote:I have a seven hour training this week on how to be a more engaged and dynamic manager


The leader of this training had one of those “that was easy” buttons that she repeatedly brought in from off camera and pushed to make points

We also had a whole session about firing “problem employees”
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Postby dragon jeans » Fri Nov 12, 2021 3:31 am

pretty sure you're actually dead and in hell (or at least purgatory) waldo :(
• no customer service
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Postby Swelling Itching Brain » Fri Nov 12, 2021 4:20 am

nah that'll be 2022 when the borders reopen and Mila appears out of the blue
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Postby easy » Mon Nov 29, 2021 9:42 am

in the last two weeks my work slack has been absolutely inundated with kernels of shitty self-care wisdom from management, like "remember to get up and stretch," "take a walk around the block," "you're doing great," "you got this," and "when was the last time you had water?"

there's also been a number of emails to the whole staff where it's like, "when was the last time you took a friday off? please, take care of yourself." and like every day now some manager will start the day in slack with something like, "tell me in the replies what kind of coffee you're drinking this morning!"

anyway, all of this leads me to believe that there's probably been a recent influx of "remind your employees to take care of themselves" PR thinkpieces that I just haven't noticed. or someone further up the chain told everyone to start "fighting burnout" and it manifested as all of these shitty rise-and-grind platitudes that everyone reacts to with a heart emoji or whatever
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Postby light rail coyote » Mon Nov 29, 2021 9:57 am

our self-care channel in slack hasn't been active for like a month now and it's got me worried. i mean i hated it and never participated, but we used to have those kind of prompts every day too.
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Postby creamline bling » Mon Nov 29, 2021 2:11 pm

easy wrote:in the last two weeks my work slack has been absolutely inundated with kernels of shitty self-care wisdom from management, like "remember to get up and stretch," "take a walk around the block," "you're doing great," "you got this," and "when was the last time you had water?"

there's also been a number of emails to the whole staff where it's like, "when was the last time you took a friday off? please, take care of yourself." and like every day now some manager will start the day in slack with something like, "tell me in the replies what kind of coffee you're drinking this morning!"

anyway, all of this leads me to believe that there's probably been a recent influx of "remind your employees to take care of themselves" PR thinkpieces that I just haven't noticed. or someone further up the chain told everyone to start "fighting burnout" and it manifested as all of these shitty rise-and-grind platitudes that everyone reacts to with a heart emoji or whatever


I can’t think of a better way to accelerate employee burnout
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